It’s not always where you are in life, but who you are with that counts.
“How do I know if I’m in the right relationship or not? ”
This is one of the most frequently asked questions in coaching. After listening to the details of their situation, we often ask them the same question to clarify their thoughts and expectations so that they agree. For example :
“What do you think a ” good relationship “should bring to people?
Although here the answer is obviously subjective, in all relationships, whether romantic or platonic, there are certain signs that clearly indicate that things are going well. So today, let’s take a look at some of the signs that confirm that you are in “good relationship”, and some tips that could help you make a “bad relationship” good:
1. We do not play any games.
Too often, we make our relationships more difficult than they are. The difficulties started when… the conversations became text messages, the feelings became subliminal, sex became a game, the word “love” came out of context, jealousy became a habit, we start to find normal being hurt, and running away from everything has become our solution.
Stop running! Face these problems, solve these problems, communicate, enjoy, forgive and LOVE the people around you who deserve it.
And of course, if you feel like someone is playing a game with you, talk about it.
2. Everyone thinks the same thing.
If a woman starts out being relaxed with a man and she does not tell her that she wants to engage in a relationship, that relationship will probably never become a serious relationship. If you give the impression of being relaxed at first, the person will think that you will always be relaxed.
In fact, you have to be right from the beginning, or at least as soon as you know what you want. Do not turn around the pot. If someone runs away because you were honest and you set the limits, that person was not good for you anyway.
3. The line of communication is open, honest, and clear.
You can not be afraid of having certain conversations. It is better to speak and discover the truth, instead of continuing to advance to get anywhere. Say what you think and think what you say. Do not expect the important people to read you in your mind, and do not play stupid games with their hearts. Do not tell them half-truths and do not expect them to trust you when the truth comes out, half-truths are no better than lies.
Listen defenselessly and speak without offense. Communication is not only an important part of the relationship, it is the relationship. Relationships often fail because of trust issues, problems with engagement, and most importantly, communication problems. So be honest, get involved, and communicate!
4. The proofs of love are signs that constantly reinforce the words of love.
Maintain your important relationships so that when you tell people that you love them, it will simply be a ritual validation of what you have already shown by the way you treat them daily. Take care every day to show your loved ones that you love them. Knowing that the person you think of is also thinking of you means a lot.
To tell the truth, you can say “sorry” thousands of times or say “I love you” as much as you want, but if you do not prove the truth of your words, it is because they have no value. If you can not show it, your words are not sincere. It’s as simple as that. And there can be no “good relationship” if you are not sincere from every angle.
5. It is strictly forbidden to expect perfection.
Any real relationship will not be perfect, but if you’re ready to work and open up, it could become anything you’ve always dreamed of.
Your best friends and soul mate may be less than perfect, but they may be the best for you. Give them a chance to prove it to you. When you stop wanting the people you love to become what you want them to be, you can begin to appreciate them for who they are.
What you need to remember is that every relationship has its problems, but what makes it perfect in the end is when you would not want to find yourself elsewhere.
6. Honesty, vulnerability, and presence are signs considered sacred.
Even though it may seem risky, the strongest love is the one that makes the most vulnerable. It’s about going beyond yourself and being whole, being open-minded and unveiling yourself in the long run. It’s about being able to count on each other and stay close to each other in the good and the bad times, to be there physically and mentally when we need you the most.
So open up. BE with the person you love. Let yourself experience this authentic way. Shoot down all the emotional brick walls you have built around you and experience all the exquisite emotions, both good and bad. That’s the real life.
7. There is a perfect balance between freedom and teamwork.
Keep in mind that you can not force anyone to be with us or to love us. We should not beg someone to stay if he wants to leave. Just as we should never feel trapped in a relationship. In fact, if one of the people feels trapped, there is no real relationship. Because that’s what defines a relationship: freedom.
Relationships are also built on a solid foundation of teamwork. And since relationships are one of the vehicles of personal growth and happiness, the most important journey of your life will be your meeting with someone halfway. You will get a lot more by working with them, rather than working alone or against them. It’s a vicious circle. The strength of a relationship depends on the strength of its two elements, and the resistance of each element, in the long run, depends on the quality of the relationship.
And remember, it’s very rarely 50/50 in a relationship. You can not always invest 100% or 50% throughout the relationship, life is too unpredictable for that. So, there are days when you can give only 20%, the other must give 80% and vice versa. There is no constant balance. In healthy relationships, both people are willing to make adjustments according to the needs of each, and give a little more when the other person can not help giving a little less.
8. Personal growth is celebrated and shared.
It’s not about finding someone to get lost in you, it’s about meeting someone to find you in him. When you connect with someone special, a best friend, or a life partner, everyone helps each other bring out the best in themselves. You both move by spending time together and helping each other evolve.
When you honestly think what you and your close confidants add to everyone’s life, you will often find that, instead of giving or taking things from each other (advice, answers, material gifts, etc.), you will rather choose to share the joy and pain of the other, and to experience life together in good and bad times. No matter who you are for each other, grow and learn as one.
9. Foreigners do not lead the boat.
Relationships do not always make sense, especially from outside. So do not let strangers run your relationships for you. If you have a problem in one of your relationships, do it with the person concerned and no one else.
You must live your life as you wish, we all have a unique fire in our heart for some people. It’s your job, and you’re the only one who can decide if a relationship is good for you. You must stop worrying about what everyone wants for you, and start living and deciding for yourself.
From your experience, what are the good signs that show you are in the right relationship? Do you have any other tips or signs that you want to share? Leave a comment below and share your thoughts.