It is very rare to come across people without any fear: spiders, closed environments, the dark, they are just some examples of the most common phobias that often limit us and prevent us from exploring new aspects of life, forcing us to stay in our safety zone.
Fears are sometimes able to paralyze us, literally.
Fear, of course, is not always a negative element, because it allows us to take the necessary precautions when we are in situations of potential risk.
But it certainly becomes a factor to be carefully considered when phobias take control of us, drastically limiting our freedom, the infinite possibilities and the riches that life offers us every day.
Here are five tips you can use to overcome your fears successfully:
1. Be aware that we are all afraid of something.
People around us probably do not have our own fears, but each of us is afraid of something, no doubt. Understanding this can help us understand that we are not isolated in our fears. We are not alone, our phobias are shared by all those around us.
The fact that we are afraid of something does not make us worse people, but only human, like all those around us.
2. You do not have to overcome your fear all at once.
The ideal solution is a small-step approach. It is not at all necessary, to overcome your fear, to face it drastically and radically. It could be counterproductive.
If you are terrified at the thought of speaking in public, for example, it is not a good idea to try and improvise a speech in front of an audience of thousands of people. Better to act gradually, without haste or rushed jumps.
3. Consider your fears as an opportunity for growth.
Try to think about what your life would be like without your fears. Things would be better, of course. Try then to look beyond the fear, to try to identify and appreciate the benefits you would find if you could overcome some of your phobias. You might glimpse a world in which it is worth taking some risk to fully appreciate its beauty.
If you can not objectively identify the benefits you would get if you exceeded your phobias, try however to think that fear is always an opportunity to grow from a personal point of view. Facing the fears and difficulties you will come out stronger, more inclined to face new challenges.
4. Change your approach to your fears.
Sometimes we fear what we imagine may happen if we leave our security zone. It is all too easy to convince ourselves that we have good reasons to be afraid.
As an essay said, “More important than what happens to us is how we talk to ourselves about what happens to us”. This is so true that we are able to imagine all the direst consequences when we think of something that frightens us. But we must be aware that what we imagine is not made real by our thinking.
It is extremely natural to be afraid of what we do not know. You do not know what could happen if you really call that person who intimidates you, you do not know how your boss would react if you really told him what you think.
Try to make a list of what could happen if you did. What do you really have to lose if you run the risk? Viewing that list on a sheet could help you understand how irrational are some of your fears. And do not forget to include in your list the possibility that things, when you take a risk, can go well.
5. Failure is not at all the end of the world.
If there is a fear that really unites most of us, this is the fear of making mistakes, the fear of failure. There are certainly some situations in which a mistake can have extremely serious repercussions, but in general, it is not so.
Usually, the consequences of a mistake are not so harmful to us or for others. Yet the fear of making mistakes still blocks many of us, limiting our actions, depriving us of exciting experiences and opportunities that could enrich our existence.
Trying, even when you are afraid, can instead open up unexpected possibilities. And if we are wrong, then it will be an experience from which to draw lessons for the future that will show us which is the right way to go. If you can not, try, and then try again.