Whenever we think about relationships, we find ourselves in our fantasy world of magic. A relationship – it almost looks like an idealistic world. You love someone, they love you back, there is no problem.
But this picture – this idealistic thinking is what can lead to huge problems in a relationship. We all have a unique perspective on what a relationship should look like.
But it is these ideals that can really harm our love life. On the contrary, if we do not change these ideals, we may not even find our love.
Here are the mistakes that keep us from finding our love:
1. Having a smooth relationship:
Relationships aren’t supposed to be smooth all the time. It will have many ups and downs. It will necessarily be a roller coaster ride. You just have to manage it that way. However, if you have the idea in your head that a relationship must always be fluid, then it is doomed to failure.
You will first judge your partner on the basis of whether he will always maintain the stable and happy relationship. Rather than learning to handle a situation, you will judge others if they are able to handle different situations. In the end, you will dismiss people at random simply because you expect harmonious relationships.
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2. Being too agreeable:
Sometimes you may want to appear as agreeable as possible. You don’t want your partner to feel bad, or you want to deliberately seem low maintenance. This is why you keep yourself almost immutable and always reduce your demands without challenging your partner.
That’s the way to stagnate a relationship. In a relationship, there must be a challenge. Show your true desires – only then will your partner want to improve and try to achieve it. If you never show what you want, your partner will stay away. The result will be a lack of growth in the relationship.
3. Ignoring red flags:
Another important thing that we do wrong when we are in a relationship is to ignore the red flags. You see them, but you don’t want to tackle them at all. You just say “We are human, we are imperfect”.
In this way, you place the red flags in the “normal human imperfection” area. Ignoring the red flags can end up making your relationship really toxic. In all of these mistakes, you will see one thing – there is a lack of honesty. So engage in some kind of radical honesty. Be completely honest with your partner. Know that a relationship will be conflicting.
You don’t have to welcome anyone or look nice – you can show your true desires. In this way, you make the relationship grow. Take risks in a relationship. Test it again and again. This is the only way to know if it is sustainable or not.
Be honest and get the most out of your relationship. It’ll be worth it.
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