Once we consciously choose the path of personal growth and are not fully conscious and attentive, we risk becoming what we might call “spiritual snobbish”.
The word “spiritual” is in a broad sense a term that refers to seeking a better path; in search of a better life. Do not let this term discourage you if it is not a term you would use to describe yourself.
There are so many different forms of growth that it is impossible to say which is the best. It’s a personal adventure. However, often when we find a path that holds us back, we sometimes put on blinders and begin to think that “it is the path that is intended for us”.
When we experience an exciting and amazing transformation in our lives, we can not help but shout it on all the roofs and share our happiness with others. It’s quite natural, and of course, normal.
It feels good to share our joy, but when it comes with attachments, it can end up creating a climate of resentment. And the reason is that, essentially, the message that your attachments send is that you do not like certain people and do not accept them for who they are and where they are. This is where spiritual snobbery makes its entrance.
From our point of view, spiritual snobbery takes these 3 main forms:
My way is the right way:
It seems to be in human nature that when we find something that works, we tend to believe and assume that it might work for others as well. You can even begin to analyze what is happening in the lives of others, or analyze the values they place on education, with the conviction that you have found the “right” way of doing things, and if they could do things your way their life would be so much better.
But we are all unique, and all must lead to different paths. And what works for one person, might not work for another.
As you become more aware, you begin to observe and better understand why others are suffering and you are trying to solve the problem.
The excuse you often tend to use is that “you want them well and want to help them.” But the truth is that you are also looking to create change at home. You see what’s wrong, and it’s a bit like an itch that you can not help but scratch.
What is difficult to understand and accept here is that you judge them. You do not evaluate the fair value of their own personal journey. It’s not because they do not have the same results as you that it does not mean they’re not growing as well. In fact, you are attached to the way, to the “how”, which you think their growth should look like.
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It’s not because you like the choices you made and that you like the way you move, that others want to do the same thing or that’s where their luck is. You have trouble understanding why someone would not want to do the same thing as you.
What often happens is that since you do not want to lose relationships as you grow up, you expect them to grow up with you too, at your own pace, so you can keep the safety net of these relationships.
It is not a question of not sharing or not inviting them to experience what you have learned and which has allowed you to grow. In fact, I strongly recommend you to share and stay open because often it’s just a matter of planting a seed, and from there you can have friends who will join you on your wonderful journey.
But it’s just about sharing and inviting without attachment or judgment. If they join you, it’s great! And if they do not, it’s good too. Their growth can take other forms.
“It is more in keeping with the love of liberating friends and family, than setting up your reality and criticizing their behavior internally.”
When you will be able to no longer be attached to the results and what others are doing (or are not doing), that is where the true peace of mind will begin.
Do not lose heart, do not judge yourself, if you have recognized yourself in certain points of this article. It happens just sometimes when we move and grow, we fall into the trap of spiritual snobbism from time to time, but with consciousness, we can rectify the situation.