You do meditation, practice mindfulness, work on your inner child, clean yourself constantly on an energetic level, keep the chakras harmonized, do Qigong, practice communication with the unconscious, and communicate with your spiritual guides. In short, you are passionate about the path of personal and spiritual development.
The only problem is that your partner is not.
In reality, not only is he not interested in inner growth, but he finds it difficult to understand why you engage in this path.
And so you might ask yourself, “Can this relationship survive?”
This is a disturbing thought that can be accompanied by feelings of anxiety and emotional distress.
In this article, we want to help you achieve a semblance of peace and clarity.
The only way to determine if your relationship is bound to fail or not is to pay attention to the context of what is happening and to your couple dynamics.
Here are some red flags to pay close attention to:
- Your partner makes fun of you and your practice.
- Your partner gets angry when you spend time on your spirituality.
- Your partner tries to stop you from practicing your spiritual path.
- Your partner has created a pronounced or unsaid “ultimatum,” or “me or your spirituality”.
- Your partner often criticizes your spiritual beliefs.
- You feel the need to “hide” your spiritual practice and do it in secret.
- You feel pressured to believe/follow what your partner believes.
- You are afraid to share your spirituality for fear of being judged or rejected.
If you said “yes” to more than one of these red flags, the problem is bigger than expected. Your relationship is overwhelming and does not allow you to grow as a person, which means that there is probably an ongoing unhealthy dynamic.
I would advise you to spend time in the coming weeks in total tranquility to reconsider your relationship.
Because you have the right to practice any form of spirituality that you feel allows you to grow. You have the right to prosper as a spiritual being and to be loved and supported, not rejected or judged negatively.
If those alarm signals are not present, your partner is not spiritual and you are, this is a positive sign (and from a certain point of view even more complex).
I will explain why below.
Recommended: How to Know if You Are in a Spiritual Relationship.
What to do if your partner is not on the spiritual path?
Understandably, it can be frustrating and demeaning to live with a person who does not share the same aspirations, perspectives or spiritual beliefs as you.
But I want to tell you something very important: beware of the ideals you create.
Concepts such as twin flames and soul mates can be useful to define and understand relationships, but in the end, they are limiting and constricting if framed in a purely spiritual context.
If you are jealously looking at other couples who seem to “have everything” spiritually speaking, let go, look elsewhere.
In other words, NO you don’t have to be in a spiritual relationship to be happy. It is not necessary to share the same beliefs or metaphysical perspectives.
Because what is more “spiritual” that exists in this world is ultimately love.
If we are talking about true spirituality here (not just the various methods, mental paths or beliefs), what ultimately matters is how much you love yourself, each other and how much you accept each other, regardless of your differences.
Pay attention to toxic comparisons.
If your partner has the ability to love, he is a spiritual person.
It doesn’t matter what you believe in as long as you are able to open your heart and you allow it to do so.
What to Avoid and What to Do with a NON-spiritual partner:
So now that we’ve made it clear whether a relationship can survive or not when the partner is not spiritual, here are some ways to make sure your relationship continues to thrive.
What NOT to Do:
- Don’t pressure your partner to adopt the same spiritual beliefs or practices that you have. Be careful not to express a negative judgment or a critical attitude towards your partner just because they are different.
- Remember that we are all at various levels of awakening. When the time comes (if it comes) your partner will also wake up.
- Don’t lose yourself in fantasies about how your partner “should” be spiritually speaking. Wanting or expecting your partner to be something other than what it is, represents the recipe for disaster. Accept the complete package of your partner (strengths and defects in the same way).
- Do not rely solely on your partner for your need for spiritual nourishment. Rather, find a local spiritual group in which you can express the spiritual side of yourself.
What to Do:
- Give an example of your actions. There is nothing so nauseating about a person who tries to proselytize others.
- Find and focus on the meeting points between you and your partner.
- Express your love, commitment and affection regularly (which in itself is a spiritual practice).
- Look at your relationship as a “school of life” and your partner as a teacher.
- Honor where your partner is. Be careful not to see yourself more spiritually “advanced” than your partner leading to the ego’s influence.
- Pay attention to the context and dynamics of your relationship.
If your connection is based on mutual love and respect then YES, it is possible to prosper and survive together.
If you have a fundamental need to connect with a spiritual partner, then NO, it is unlikely that living with a “non-spiritual” partner will satisfy you.
Before jumping to any conclusion, I ask you to consider what it means to you to be spiritual:
- Is it based on your path or your beliefs?
- Are you happy to do your thing and allow your partner to do his thing?
I hope you have a little more clarity.